We're different...but we can still talk

After reading the chapter "Widening the Circle", I couldn't stop thinking about what really makes an individual grow. Isn't it disagreement that makes an individual think and reflect? Isn't discrepancy the thing that makes people settle for the best choices? Aren't differences what make individuals unique? Isn't divergence of opinion what makes a democracy?

Ever since we were teenagers, we battled many disagreements with parents. These disagreements didn't always finish in a nice peaceful conversation. Over time, however, we learned to value other people's opinion, listening and accepting the fact that our ideas may not always be the best option. Later in adulthood, we realize that our life partner is most often the person who gives us a different perspective on life, motivating us to think and reformulate our thoughts.

When we learn to apply the art of listening with an open mind, we are able to better evaluate new ideas in the work place as well as our personal lives. Moreover, we are able to use these ideas to influence different groups of people and advocate causes that we believe in. Loeb states "Whenever we reach across traditional boundaries, we create opportunities for learning and growth."

This is often easier said than done however. Sometimes we opt to be surrounded exclusively by others who think the same way we do because it is safer and more comfortable agree with the rest. There is little risk in simply saying, "that is the way I was raised".

Loeb tells the story of C.P. Ellis, a son of one of the members of the Ku Klux Klan who was taught by his father to target black people. Ellis rose to a high rank of Exalted Cyclops in the Klan and despite his entrenchment in the racist organization, began to have disagreements with Klan philosophy. Eventually Ellis began to look at African Americans beyond their "nigger" nicknames, worn out cloths and ragged shoes. He finally began to see them as human beings.

C.P. Ellis was emotionally touched by members of "the target group" when during an emotionally charged public meeting to address racial tensions, a black man called Ellis the most honest man in the meeting. Several meetings later, Ellis was nominated to co-chair the meeting and work closely with Ann Atwater, a black woman he hated "with purple passion". After "reluctantly working together", the two eventually became close friends and Ellis found new purpose as a union organizer, putting poor people (both black and white) together to fight employer abuses. Although Ellis and Atwater had nothing in common, they were willing to at least listen to each other, putting aside their differences when they could. As Loeb says, "The more we listen to those whose experiences and perspectives are unfamiliar, the more we realize what draws us together".

In my personal life, I try to remain open to the benefits of interactions with people around me, whether it be the clash of opinions between different political viewpoints or religions, I always find something new and valuable to gain from the experience. That is one of the reasons I enjoy being part of SLICE, having the ability to discuss emotionally charged issues in an open forum.

I really like the thoughts of Henry Ford, who said.....

"If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own."